Director's Notes:  Once upon a time, when I was just a film student, there was an assignment where the program was divided into arbitrary crews and we were given a week to make a film based on a prop that was given to us in a mysterious brown paper bag.  My group’s prop was an old war photograph (of a teacher’s relative… oops).  This was the script I came up with.   Unfortunately, because we were putting the film together so quickly, faulty school equipment and some bold sound choices which I had no say in (including the dreaded record-scratch-to-indicate-joke trick) caused the film to be… terrible.  However, in spite of its wholly apparent awfulness, the screening of the film got amazing laughs and, even after graduating, people would still compliment me on it.  At the dawn of the Offline, one of Paul Stachniak’s most fervent requests was that we remake this film for the site.  He certainly was committed to the project— he stuck his HD camera in my fireplace, just to get a good shot!   What more can one ask for in a crew?  This is my first movie completely devoid of any rational thought (look at the title), so turn off your brain, sit back and enjoy Hanks For The Memories.  – Daniel Warth